As many couples find out the hard way, the spark that led to them falling in love and getting married doesn’t always last forever.
If you find yourself in this situation, there are usually three options available:
- Repair the relationship.
- File for divorce.
- Give co-parenting and marital partnerships a try.
While splitting up is difficult for any couple, it’s much harder when The picture features children because of the way they might respond to the situation. It’s not uncommon, for example, for some children to think that they themselves are the reason their parents are getting divorced.
To be sure, divorce is definitely warranted in some cases — particularly if you’re keen on dissolving legal bonds with your spouse. If you simply can’t get along with your partner any longer, you may be better off divorcing so that you don’t expose your kids to chronic conflict, which can have disastrous effects on their development.
That said, a clear-cut divorce isn’t always the best option. Couples are increasingly exploring other parenting approaches in order to provide their children with the love and support they need.
Should We Stay Together? Lifestyle Alternatives to Divorce
According to the New York TimesLately, divorce rates have been declining. This can be attributed to the uncertainty caused by the pandemic. Couples decide to stay together to weather the storm. On the other, it’s because more and more parents are pursuing more modern types of relationships, including marital partnerships and co-parenting agreements.
A marital partnership, also known by the name “parenting marriage”, is a nonromantic relationship in which the parents live together and care for their children. From the outside, a parenting marriage looks exactly the same as a traditional marriage. When you’re in a parenting marriage, you still go out to dinner and the movies together as a family, for example.
Though they are difficult for both spouses, marital partnerships deliver a number of benefits to children. They ensure children have a stable, consistent upbringing and ensure both parents are present at important events and activities.
Of course, living with someone you’re no longer in love with doesn’t necessarily appeal to everyone. It may not be worth the effort depending on the circumstances.
In these circumstances, it’s still possible to maintain a healthy, civil relationship with your spouse after a divorce by embracing a concept called co-parenting, which is also known as platonic parenting.
Platonism is the process where two parents come together to raise their children together. While parents might get legally divorced and live in different places, they both raise their kids together, seeing each other often in both public and private settings. This gives children the stability and continuity they need to live healthy lives.
There are many challenges that come with co-parenting. Chief among them is the fact that co-parents need to be respectful to each other at all times and never disparage their ex in front of their kids. However, there are other things you can do. The right approach to parentingYou can teach your children great lessons about problem-solving and communication skills, while also reducing anxiety and stress that could result from a more serious split.
What do children really need from their parents?
It doesn’t really matter if you decide to improve your marriage, have a parenting relationship, or become coparents. What matters most is that you are able to Give your children the childhood they deserve.
Whatever approach you take, it’s important to keep your kids safe, listen to them and spend time with them, and provide affection, order, and consistency. You must also set and enforce limits, understand your children’s free time, and keep track of any mental and medical issues.
If you’re in a hard place in your relationship and don’t know what to do, all hope isn’t lost. Talking with a therapist can help you find the best way forward. The right therapist will be able to help you determine what you want, what aligns with your values, and how to make it happen in a healthy way that doesn’t hurt your children.
© Copyright 2021 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved. GoodTherapy has granted permission to publish
Please complete all fields in order to send your message.
Please confirm that you are a human.